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You know I used to be a bad girl
I got busy in the bathroom at my high school prom
Yeah I used to be a dancer at the local strip club
But now I know my right wing from my wrong

Yeah, yeah

I really used to be a bad girl
I had a threesome with my sister and her boyfriend Tom
I know I used to be a real wild child
But now I am a Volvo-driving soccer mom

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I really used to be a bad girl
I got busted for possession of my wizard-shaped bong
I used to love to do the things they tell me not to do
But now I'm different--now I sing a new song

I really used to be a bad girl
I got gang-banged in the bathroom at my high school prom
Yes, I used to be a real wild child
But now I am a Volvo-driving soccer mom

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Where do all the porn stars go
When the lights go down?
I wonder where all the porn stars go
'Cause when you need one, they are never around

I think they moved out to the suburbs
And now they're blonde, bland, middle-class Republican wives
They all have blonde, bland, middle-class Republican children
Blonde, bland, middle-class Republican lives

Where do all the porn stars go
When the lights go down?
I think I know where all the porn stars go
They all become Volvo-driving soccer moms

Na-na na-na na-na na-na na-na na-na