Give us this day our daily dose of faux affliction,
Forgive our sins
Forged at the pulpit with forked tongues selling faux sermons
Because I am a new wave gospel sharp, and you'll be thy witness
So gentlemen, if you are going to preach,
For God sakes preach with conviction!

Strike up the band!
Whoa! the conductor is beckoning
Come congregation,let's sing it like you mean it
No. Don't you get it don't you get it? Now don't you...move.

Strike up the band!
Whoa! the conductor beckoning
Come congregation,let's sing it like you mean it
No. Don't you get it don't you get it? Now don't you...move.

Just stay where I can see you.
Douse the lights!
We sure are in for a show tonight.

In this little number we are graced by two displays of character,
We've got: the gunslinger extraordinaire, a walking contradiction;
And I for one can see no blood
From the hearts and the wrists you allegedly slit
And I for one wont stand for this
If the scene were a parish you'd all be condemned.

Strike up the band!
Whoa the conductor is beckoning
Come congregation, let's sing it like you mean it
No. Don't you get it don't you get it? Now don't you...move.

Strike up the band!
Whoa the conductor is beckoning
Come congregation,let's sing it like you mean it
No. Don't you get it don't you get it? Now don't you, don't you...move.

Just stay where I can see you.
Douse the lights!
...We sure are in for a show tonight

Just stay where I can see you.
Douse the lights!
...We sure are in for a show tonight

Just stay where I can see you.
Douse the lights!
La da ta ta la da ta ta la da ta ta....

Strike up the band!
Whoa! the conductor is beckoning
Come congregation,let's sing it like you mean it.
No. Don't you get it don't you get it? Now don't you move...

Strike up the band!
Whoa! the conductor is beckoning
Come congregation,let's sing it like you mean it.
No. Don't you get it don't you get it? Now don't you move...

Don't you move
Don't you move!
Strike up the Band!