[SPONSOR]

to the tune of "I Want It That Way" by the Backstreet Boys

Yeah

A used... pink bathrobe, a rare ... mint snow glob
A Smurf ... TV tray, I bought on eBay

My house ... is filled with this crap, shows up in bubble wrap
most every day, what I bought on eBay

Tell me why ( I need another pet rock), Tell me why (I got that ALF alarm clock)
Tell me why (I bid on Shatner's old toupee), They had it on eBay

I'll buy ... your knick-knack, Just check ... my feed back
"A++" they all say, they love me on eBay

Gonna buy (a slightly-damaged golf bag), Gonna buy (some Beanie Babies, new with tag) (From some guy) I never met in Norway, found him on eBay

I am the type who is liable to snipe you, with two seconds left to go, whoa
Got Paypal or Visa, whatever'll please ya. As long as I've got the dough!
I'll buy ... your tchotchkes, sell me ... your watch please
I'll buy (I'll buy, I'll buy, I'll buy...) I AM HIGHEST BIDDER! now

(Junk keeps coming in the mall, from that world-wide garage sale) (Hey a Dukes of Hazard ashtray), oh yeah ... (I bought on eBay) Wanna buy (a PacMan Fever lunchbox) Wanna buy (a case of vintage tube socks) Wanna buy (a Kleenex used by Dr Dre, found it on eBay) Wanna buy (that Farrah Fawcett poster) (Pez dispensers and a toaster) Don't know why (That kind of stuff you'd throw away) (I'll buy on eBay) What I bought on eBay ....