The Sacred Chalice, Pt. 1 - Ninja Sex Party

The legends say the chalice lies in the mountain of a thousand nights
And he who wields it will become crazy awesome (crazy awesome)
And all my life, I've wondered what awesomeness was really like
So I assembled the greatest warriors of our time

It was me, and Ninja Brian
And a robot and an elf
And a hooker that I hired
Uhhh, actually there wasn't a hooker
I, uhh, just remembered
That was another robot

On a quest for destiny and greatness
And maybe some bagels
'Cause it was gonna be a long trip

We will follow the guiding light of the North Star
Onto the adventure of our lives
Never stopping, except maybe for the bagels
With cream cheese

We travelled miles by winter's light
Fought a dragon and a mountain lion
We don't have any footage
But that sh_t totally happened
(Dramatization!)
Then one day, we arrived at the drawbridge of medieval times
It sounded scary, but the guard seemed really nice
And with his help we'll

Follow the guiding light of the North Star
In whatever direction it points! (North)
We'll always fight to be awesome
As awesome as part two

(Part two coming soon)

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